This week’s Thanksgiving podcast episode has Merie and Becky examining nutso-deluxo cases of holiday meal-based family murders, featuring murderer Joel Guy, Jr. Along the way, they address the burning questions you didn’t know you had, like:

Do YOU have a safety advisor around when you financially cut off your grown-assed adult human male child? (Perhaps you should. Especially if he looks like this guy ↓)

Does YOUR murder checklist always include Walmart? (Of course it does. Especially if it is written in this handwriting ↓)

Do you write letters to the authorities to prevent yourself from gouging out your roommate’s eyes?

Will Merie pick YOU up from your surgery? (Hint: no.)

Does the devil cause Becky’s prayer-based collapsing pillow debacle?

Come for the can-shaped cranberries. Stay for Becky’s how-to-not-murder-your-parents-to-do list.

Also, why is Becky fearing Merie’s penis hat? (See below & be terrified ↓. Very terrified.)

Sources for this episode include: All That’s Interesting. Medium.